Thursday, May 8, 2008

Back Home

I'm sure you all remember my blog about returning home for the summer and all the bummer expectations I had. Well, I'm happy to report that I'm back home with the family and things are going pretty well. I do miss Provo quite a bit and there is definitely other things I miss more about that city, aka josh, but it's been relaxing here at home. I've actually seen quite a few blessings over the last week. My scholarship was renewed for this next fall. Ba-Zing. Another $4,000 towards school and I just got a phone call today saying I got the internship I applied for. It's a paid internship, so that's definitely a plus. I do love money. Not over-obsessive love; just love. I mean come on, being a full-time student does require quite a bit of money. Anyhow, I've just been super blessed lately.
I find that returning home after a year away at college does something to you. I mean I can see obvious changes in myself but I feel so much more distant from my friends that stayed here this year. I don't see this change in all of them but a select few I've found it harder to be around. I don't know if I changed and they stayed the same or they changed or maybe we both changed. But whichever it is, it just isn't the same. I haven't decided how I feel about that yet. It does cut down my number of friends but it could also be a good thing. I guess I'll wait and find out.
So I've been substituting in a preschool these last couple weeks I've been home. I love it. Today the preschool director told me I'm the new favorite sub :) I really enjoy being around the kids and helping them learn and develop. My major is Early Childhood Education so I've spent some time learning how to educate young children and I can't wait for the day I get to actually apply everything I've learned to my own children or perhaps even my own classroom someday. I'm really excited to be a mother someday. I was watching home videos with my family a few months back and on the video my dad asked what I wanted to be when I grew up. I replied, "a mommy" with a huge smile. I've always wanted to be a mom and as the time grows closer I only want it more. It sounds strange I know because I'm only 19 but I know when the time comes, I'll be ready.
Dang. I just missed 11:11
I love Dove chocolates because every time you eat one you get these wonderful words of wisdom. Most times I try to really take them to heart. I had one earlier in the year that said "Learn how much your heart can hold" I had it pinned up on my wall through the entire semester and made a goal to open my heart and really try to love everyone. I started seeing people in a different way than usual and I think it did me some good. I learned how easy it is to love others and how important it is to be forgiving. Being away from my friends and family for 8 months also taught be how to be more grateful for those I have and all they do for me.
Well, it's getting late so I should be getting to bed. I have to get up around 8 because I have an MRI tomorrow morning. I found a lump in my left thigh just over a week ago. I went to the doctor on Tuesday and he said that it is soft and rubbery which is good but it's in the muscle. Normally, this wouldn't be a problem but he said it's quite rare for someone my age to have a lump in their muscle. So tomorrow I'm having an MRI. I should find out what it is within 24-36 hours of the MRI. I hope it's nothing. But if you get a chance, say a prayer for me. :)

I love you all...
til next time!
-db

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